weiiird day.

::me at home::

me: mom! mom! what would you do if i told you that i wanted a vertial labret?
mom:vertical
me: yeah! a lip piercing that goes THROUGH my lip.
mom: NO!
me: what about a eyebrow piercing?
mom: no
me: what about a cartilage piercing?
mom: NO. what if i got that done too, would it stil lbe something that you want to do still??
me: oh yeah! that would be so cool on you! lets get it done together!
mom: NO NO NO
me: ok then, since you dont want any holes in my body, can i get an ipod?
mom: what??

ah, the greatness of going home. on a cooler note, my grandma's here! wowsas. its like a full house.

my comp is being dumb. actually i think i drove it to act like that. i tend to have that effect on people.

anyways, my hall is dead again. i need saving. save mee

so i guess making a crappy old website was actually a good thing back when i was 13. so i restored a screen name to my aol acount, (Ox VanEstHerZ Xo, fuck me and my alternating lower case and upper case lettering) and i remembered that i had a easy designer website that i made and occasionally updated. well, im bored, i finished my essay and i really dont want to study so here is an old survey, done sometime when i was thirteen and in 8th grade. i'll make my 18 year old self comments in bold because its just that funny

NAME: Vanessa
that hasnt changed obviously.

AGE: 13
that has.

DOB: 9.30.85
same.

HEIGHT: 5'3"
5'3 and a HALF!

HOME: home?
well apparently, when i was 13, i didnt know where my home was..

EYES: drk brown
they're really just brown.

HAIR COLOR: brown
same

FAVORITE RELATIVES: sistah danielle, cuzin wendell and jerel
well they're all really cool, but my sister is now my favoritest.

WHAT DO YOU REMEMBER MOST ABOUT THE PAST YEAR: the sex, the drugs (j/k) ummmmm year? what year?
the sex, the drugs. (n/j)

WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT OUIJA BOARDS: funky
magnetic

FAVORITE TV SHOW: Buffy, Friends, Simpsons, Days of our lives, sunset beach, infomercials damn.
i still i like infomercials and sunset beach is cancelled!

WHAT'S ON YOUR MOUSE PAD: a green design
i have no mouse pad

IN THE CAR, AC OR WINDOWS: ac both!
breathe in the toxic air!

DO YOU BELIEVE IN YOURSELF: technically yes but not really
huh?

FAVORITE MAGAZINE: elle
what was i doing reading elle when i was 13?

FAVORITE DRINK: Nes Tea w/ extra sugar
sobe. sobe yourself.

FAVORITE SOUND: bing!
bong!

FAVORITE SMELL: nail polish, pancit plabok, mandarin orange tea
i love the smell of clean hair.

FAVORITE THING TO DO ON THE WEEKEND: go online, veg out in front of da tv,shop at Jet Rag
damn, i was shopping at jet rag when i was 13. i was cool.

WHERE DO YOU SEE YOURSELF IN 10 YEARS: 23 years old????..... not doing much
i had high hopes as a 13 year old.

WHAT WAS THE FIRST THING YOU THOUGHT OF WHEN YOU WOKE UP THIS MORNING: shut up danielle!!!!!!!!! or that was a really funky dream
riight

DO YOU GET MOTION SICKNESS: no
i get head aches.

ROLLER COASTERS-DEADLY OR EXCITING: exciting
exciiiting

PEN OR PENCIL: mechanical pencil
pen

HOW MANY RINGS BEFORE YOU ANSWER THE PHONE: 3
one. i'm too old to let people wait.

FUTURE SONS NAME: Westley, John, or Kevin
what was i thinking?

FUTURE DAUGHTERS NAME: Juliette, Charlotte, Emily
what was i thinking?

ARE YOU A GOOD FRIEND: um depends on who you ask
yes i am.

CHOCOLATE OR VANILLA: vanilla
same

DO YOU LIKE TO DRIVE: yeah...... i drive *all* the time
wow. scary how this has changed but becamse truth again.

DO YOU SLEEP WITH A STUFFED ANIMAL: no
big body hug pillow.

THUNDERSTORMS?: yeah
??

IF YOU COULD MEET ONE PERSON LIVING OR DEAD WHO WOULD IT BE: Vincent Armada (lols) hehehehehhhahahahahahaha but he *was* cute in 3rd grade
jesus christ. thats scary how i found him on friendster.

WHAT IS YOUR ZODIAC SIGN: libra
same

WHAT DO YOU WEAR TO BED: nothing (j/k) ummm shorts and a shirt
nothing. ok ok j/king agin.

DO YOU EAT STEMS OF BROCCOLI: no, i let my mom eat them
i dont eat broccoli

IF YOU COULD HAVE ANY JOB YOU WANTED WHAT WOULD IT BE: stripper (j/k) a shrink?
i still dont know what to do.

IF YOU COULD DYE YOUR HAIR ANY COLOR WHAT WOULD IT BE: black w/ red streaks
thats a good idea...

IF YOU COULD HAVE A TATTOO WHAT AND WHERE WOULD IT BE: snake around my upper arm
thats a good idea too.

WHATS YOUR FAVORITE BRAND OF GUM: any thing
orbits!

WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE QUOTE: Quotes Are for those who cant think for themselves
tee hee.

HAVE YOU EVER BEEN IN LOVE: yes/no depends on your definition of love
yes, definitely yes.

WHAT'S ON THE WALLS IN YOUR LIVING ROOM: a clock
not anymore. there are plants, plates, paintings...

IS THE GLASS HALF EMPTY OR HALF FULL: half empty
but its only half full

PICK A SONG THAT DESCRIBES YOU, MEANS A LOT TO YOU, OR YOU CAN RELATE TO: I'm just A girl by no doubt
good choice.

WHAT'S YOUR FAVORITE SNAPPLE: diet peach ( the reeeeeaaaaally sweet one)
regular peach now.

FAVORITE MOVIE: The Princess Bride and The Chinese Connection w/ Bruce Lee
good choice!

COKE OR PEPSI: Coke
carbonation!

WHITE OR CHOCOLATE MILK: Green hehehehe hmmmm white
im lactose intolerant

IF YOU WERE TO KILL SOMEONE WHAT WOULD YOU USE: rope, crisco, and a whip (hehehehehehehehehe)
kinky

DO YOU TYPE WITH YOUR FINGERS ON THE RIGHT KEYS: no
nopes

WHEN YOU MEET A PERSON OF THE OPPOSITE SEX THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE IS: his (beeeeeep) j/k ummmmm... his hair then his eyes
hee hee

IF YOU COULD BE ONE GARDENING TOOL WHICH WOULD YOU BE: shovel
a hoe

WHAT KIND OF SHOE WOULD YOU BE: sandals ( a pair you get at the Phillipines)
tsinelas!

IF YOU COULD DO ANYTHING TO THE PERSON YOU HATED MOST WHAT WOULD IT BE: kick his ass
well said

WHAT IS UNDER YOUR BED: clothes, pizza, rotten stuff, old barbies, old mags, shoes, books, old skool work stuff like that
sadly, thats stuff would probably still be there if i never changed rooms.

WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE NUMBER: 86 (dont ask)
really, dont ask

WHAT IS YOUR DREAM CAR: A jaguar or a big ass truck
my benz!

WHO IS YOUR BIGGEST CRUSH RIGHT NOW: that guy who picks up the fone at kiis fm.
hobbits

SAY SOMETHING NICE ABOUT THE PERSON THAT SENT THIS TO YOU: why!!!!!!???????? :: pouts:: uhhhh nice tie?????
thanks peter kim.

ahh... i really dont feel like doing anything right now

anyways, i've been thinking in my room. and alex 209 told me last night and had to repeat it again this afternoon the best advice, "onwards and upwards, vanessa"

onwards and upwards. thats the motion of life! at least its the direction you want life to go in. i need to go home. and i also need to go to class. i hate these huge blocks of space between classes... curses!

in the mean time, im going to my math lab. and after that, im going to have my 5 cups of coffee. yes.

to do list
- find mineral ice
- study for math midterm again
- study for psych midterm
- do art history essay. i had a feeling last night that i should have started on it then. but do i listen to my self? no.
- laundry? no, my arms arent capable of such a load.
- shower. second shower of the day? why not.
- get off this internet.

the end! the next time you will read a new post, hopefully its not post about procrastination but a post of triumph over my academic achievements.

random bloggage. i need to register my bike. i need to bring socks back from home. i have a total of 4 pairs of socks including my two pairs of argyles and my christmas socks with a picture of santa claus on it. my arms hurt like no other. i'm wearing my glasses on a regular basis. kat turns 19 in a WEEK. old fart. i need to stop eating fruit breezers as if they're candy. i want to drive stick. as danielle says, "i drove my stick fast and i drove my stick hard." word. i need to bring a calendar home. i need to write an art history essay for tomorrow. i have a math midterm tomorrow. i have a psych midterm tomorrow. i need icy hot for my arms. my mom called me to say that i had 40 pairs of underwear at home. ¿40? i hope shes exaggerating.

class at 3? ha

Five Items I Have Brand Loyalty To:
1. dove shampoo
2. yucas, wait, thats not a brand
3. victoria's secret
4. kiehls
5. mac

Five Snacks I Enjoy:
1. the chocolate that hardens when it goes on icecream
2. cheese on crackers!
3. hotdog on a stick
4. soft pretzels
5. mushrooms

Five Things I Would Buy With $1000:
1. stuff for my aquarium
2. a status bag. probably kate spade
3. dresser table
4. shoes. cute ones. that are slingbacks... open toe... yeah.
5. inails gift certificate!

Five Locations I'd Like to Run Away To:
1. my car
2. kat's place
3. the freeway
4. guitar center
5. my closet

Five Bad Habits I Have:
1. i interupt people
2. being messy
3. buying makeup that i never use
4. not letting go of things
5. yahoo! news. im a news junkie

Five Good Habits I Have:
1. i occasionally clean
2. i am usually on time
3. sometimes im early
4. i remember my friends
5. i remember people

Five Things I Would Never Wear:
1. plaid and stripes
2. white and white
3. halter and a strap bra O.o
4. white jeans
5. that saint brendan's oxford shirt with the rounded collar

How about.. 5 things i want to wear?
1. my gray adidas gazelles
2. jeans from anywhere that FIT
3. renee's outfit for new years!
4. my winter formal 2002 dress.
5. nice a-line skirts

Five TV shows:
1. rich girls
2. i love the 80's
3. food network
4. channel 7 news
5. sex and the city

its monday! i survived my weekend at riverside!

my weekend was alright. i ...

- finished my study sheet[s] for psych
- studied for matematicas
- went to tgi fridays for the first time
- slept for a very very long time

good times. i was doing some blog skipping and profile looking and i came across a mutual friend, chrissi's xanga. people like her make me wish i was as cool as she was when i was 15. anyways, she had an amazing point, "How can something so strong have an ending?". jesus, if i could think, no, question like that, i dont know what i would do. man, did that give me something to think about while i was watching the golden globes.

anyways, eden turned 19 yesterday. wow! happy birthday, twin!

oh shit, its my moms birthday today. happy fifty-somethingith birthday. damn. if i can age the way both my parents have aged, i should be looking like in 5 when i'm 50.

alright, alright. i start class tomorrow at 3.

so, what will this weekend be like? if you guys are wondering whats so special about this weekend, its that its my FIRST weekend staying here in riverside without doing anything. i mean, when i didnt go home on the weekends, i always went elsewhere. anyways, i think i'll probably crack in the middle of saturday afternoon and beg someone to pick me up. or maybe i'll ride to los angeles on my cow.

in the mean time i will be online. for a very, very long time.

new blogskin, blogskin. oh well. perhaps i should make an archive of all my old blogskins. they're all in text for on microsoft notepad, so hopefully, this computer doesnt explode. the font is larger than before, so its easier on our ever aging eyes. especially for kat, who is without a functioning pair of glasses. so, good morning!

there are a couple types of blog. of course, theres the blog like eden's. always updated, never killed. very consistent. then theres katie's blog. occasional blogger because everytime she blogs, its truely an occasion. then there are immigrants to live journal, like erin and erin.

of course you cant forget the dead blogs. there are killed blogs like katrina's. blogs that are moved like lorenz's. dead blogs that just kinda disappeared like belinda's. xangas that no longer have entries like tracy's. dead blogs that are actually made into other blogs like jeff's. blogs that are still in existance but the rest of their blog was moved like kat's. then theres the killed then resurrected one, like mine.

i apologize. its 5:30 am and i have nothing to write about. and you all know what that means...

it is time to change my blog skin.

i think i need to go to sleep but in retrospect, i havent gone to sleep late in a while and remember, my most best work emerges from random nights when i stay awake. oh well. moment of the night:

i was walking from the gym and it was about twelve midnight. yeah sure.. i'm hardcore like that. ::diva eyes::. anyways, my friend chintan and owen start walking next to me, arms full of boxes of poki, doritos, and nachos. so chintan says, with a nacho dripping in fake lactose free cheese in hand,

"you want one?"

yeah, well it was funny, trust me.

me? obsessed with the toxic video? naaah

ok. yes. yes i am. i suppose my 9th grade self would be scolding me right now, but damn. damn, damn, damn. britney spears is hot in that video. im sorry. some one kill me. please. ::stares at computer screen:: dammit! look away!

anyways. i just wore my old pair of dickies that i used to wear a lot senior year, but then i stopped wearing because... they stopped fitting. it was good day.

i have approximately 1000+ pages of reading. but have i done any of it? no. when do i plan on doing this monumental reading? i pass on that question.

anyways, my blog is in need of some botox. re-skinning that is. i relaly wonder when that day will come when i make a skin from scratch. someday... someday. that day just hasnt come yet. in the mean time...

::mesmerized::

this weekend, revised.

dad: wow! this weekend was so exciting! you cleaned the fish tank!
me: right dad...

anyhoo, the debut was successful. very awesome. my grandma's thing was cool too. cleaning my fish tank was cool. south coast plaza was cool too.

http://www.pbase.com/vbarr001/bethels_debut those are pictures.

im sleepy now
niiight

this weekend! (insert many exclaimation points)

i'll blog more about this later. and probably post pics. as if you even want to see them. maybe i'll just post a picture of great black mail pictures. ok they arent good blackmails pics, but they are pictures of people asleep and you know how funny people look when sleeping.

daniella is leaving tomorrow again. back to freezing temperatures and to a place where uggs are actually a sort of necessity.

and crap! this weekend isn't even over yet.

but i forgot... HAPPY BIRTHDAY DING! your debut was amazing. im so proud of you.

well, maybe i will blog about this weekend right now. it started on thursday when i was picked up by kuya in riverside. and we headed over to glendale for our final debut practice.

danielle came home early the next morning. i was awake because i ended up talking on the phone with beck for like, three hours, talking about people, dings debut gift, star bucks, realizing that we're neighbors, and all that good stuff.

i woke up a few hours later and i got picked up by beck to buy some random whatnot for dings pseudo-court gift. we got, a cosmo, to enrich her entrance into society. three types of vinegar, a shot glass, which was used to drink shot of vinegar with, a pack of marbororgh reds, and apple juice!

"can you just LAY on me" -SatC

i have debut shoes. they make me tall. and i've been walking around my hall in my sweat pants, and these shoes. word.



ok ok. these are kat's shoes. she originally bought them. then i got jealous and bought them too.

thats all.

i know eden, im just looking out for my own safety :)

anyways, yes... class has started. im pretty excited for all the work that im going to be doing? weird? for me, yes. 17 units and 4 classes. its a good day. this is what im taking. this isnt for my stalkers out there. this is for me so i can look back when i am 24 at this old blog and reminice about the classes that i took.

ahs 7
so, this is art history. well.. technically, tis world art: images, issues and ideas. major props to the alliterative fellow/gal who thought up that title for the course. my professor is english and skinny. calista flockhart skinny. v. interesting.

math 5
yay. finally, a math course that i havent taken 3 times before. my professor seems alright. frighteningly CLEAR when teaching. such a refreshing change from sadaat. not only is she my professor, shes my TA for discussion which brings us to the fact that she is her own assistant.

psych 2
yes, the class everyone and their sister is taking. theres about 10 people in my hall who are taking that class with me and then theres rest of riverside.

english 1b
my teacher is ben stein. fabulous.

matt sharp, formerly of weezer and the rentals performed last night at ucrville. the opening acts were really kick back and entertaining. first opening act: girl on acoustic guitar. nice use of the capo. second: dude on guitar, he sang "only hope " from a walk to remember. i didnt know that you could play that on the guitar so, it was an interesting redition. third band: weezer cover band. they did a COOL rendition of pink triangle. fourth band: the vampires. so my friend owen, alex, vince and liz joined me by then and when were heard, " the vampires" we instantly thought crazy goth band. but no! they were a fresh weezer cover band! so rad! we're going next week with a sign that says "the vampires, we heart you". matt sharp showed up and performed some songs that can only be explained as... aribitrary. but none the less rad. best line of the night

matt sharp: "riverside's such a beautiful place... thats such a fucking lie."

haha. awesome.

waaah.

what is wrong when you have SHARP PAIN IN YOUR UPPER ABDOMINAL REGION?

for eden:

500 W. Big Springs Dr #53
Riverside, CA 92507

for others:

123 fake street
fake, ca 123456

meanwhile, back in ucrville...

im back to my 12 by 13 living space. all is good in the world. and my thighs hurt from the tango. yes. i love the burn.

danielle: awww you're leaving me tomorrow!
vanessa: im going to see you before you leave.
danielle: what?
vanessa: IM GOING TO BE BACK HERE BEFORE YOU LEAVE.
danielle: hahaha and the week after i leave, i'll be back too!

yesterday, was a long debut practice. well... longer for me because i got up at 9am with a sore throat.

anyways, after that long debut practice, i went out with my sister. we ate, bought stuff at best buy, was taken aback buy the enormous amount of music at amoeba records, and flipped through the lucky fashion guide at borders. after trying to find a grocery store that was open after 12am we ended up at california market. i bought theraflu that knocked me out after i got home.

OH! angry moment of the day

i have no clue what people hate about my car, but three weeks ago, my car was egged in eagle rock, and when i came back to me car at best buy, SOME ONE SHOT A PAINT BALL AT IT! right on my windshield window! what the fuck?? i couldnt see through half of my window for half the night. grr... and i couldnt wipe it off because it spread even more. actually, that angry moment lead to my funny moment: wheile looking for a grocery store that was open, i spotted a coin-op car wash. i intended to only wash my window, but then i ended up washing my whole car. while i was soaping porbee up, i ran out of time! the time thing started beeping and danielle was cracking up. yeah, it was funnier if you saw me in my huge northface jacket, being blown away in the wind, and trying to control an amazingly strong stream of water.

the end!

calendars mark days that go by and allow you plan out future events. most people own one, at most two. perhaps one being a hanging calendar and the other a tear away one. i, on the other hand, enjoy owning many of them.

[added because i realized that the above entry is rather... out of place]

i woke up at 11 when i should have been up at 10 and then i realized that i didn't even have to be up in the first place. i headed over to borders... alone. i actually called eden to see if she was awake so i could bother her because half way to glendale i realized that i didnt want to be alone. i called but she wasnt picking up so it went to her voicemail. apparently, i didnt hang up, so i think she has a vocil mail of me singing tragic kingdom. oops. well at least i think i did. i think eden would have called me just to laugh.

anyway, walking alone to borders i bought three more calendars to my three 2004 calendars that i already have. yeah. hence the above entry. i also went to ae and bought stuff thus fulfilling my resolution not to dress frumpily.

i then headed over to eagle rock for debut practice which was quite productive.

after that, jo, kat and i decided to hangout somemore at burbank. we were all tired so we ended up eating at islands.

now, my throat feels like its closing up. blaaah. and theres no tea in the frigging house. jesus, we have a nice looking kitchen but no tea.

new years resolutions? well, its almost the end of the first day of the new year. actually, probably by the time i look over this stuff and post it on blogger, it'll be january second.

1) stop looking frumpy when i go out.

2) seriously master "F" .

3) procrastinate. a lot.

happy new year. things i learned in the last few hours of the old year:

- those dudes pushing shopping carts full of corn are really cool
- puppies you find in boxes change lives
- leslie throws a MEAN par-taay
- mario party = two hours of finger cramping fun
- eden: award for best dressed.
- "you want to smell my burnt skin?!"

also: my moment of the night

you remember that part of Men in Black I, where they erase agent j's fingerprints by BURNING them off? well i just experienced that! while swinging my arms up to hug kay tea ess goodbye, i brushed my fingers on the HOT BURNING GAS HEATER THING. word. but thanks to my sleepless nights at ucr playing F on the guitar, i had nice calluses on my fingers so only dead skin got burned off. it is also reminicent of the santas little helper episode of the simpsons where he tears up the simpson quilt and marge shows the callus on her fingertip to lisa and holds a lighter under it. yeah.